Niall Singh: “Often, how I see myself has been defined by white people”
The artist on being defined, distanced and erased from history – and how he’s putting himself back in
Credit: Stalingrad O’Neil
Hi, welcome back to Mixed Messages! This week I’m speaking to artist Niall Singh, who is of mixed Indian and Scottish heritage. Niall is currently showing at Birmingham’s Midlands Arts Centre as part of Mixed Rage Collective, a group of five mixed-race artists. After visiting the group’s Unapologetically Other exhibition, I was excited to speak to Niall about his experiences in the city. Read his story below.
What’s your racial background?
I grew up in Bedfordshire in a very white working class area, then I moved to Birmingham about 15 years ago. My dad came from the Punjab when he was about twelve years old, and my mum’s from the South West of Scotland. I’ve got a strong family connection in Scotland and I see myself as Scottish and mixed-race.
A huge part of my experience is growing up in a very white place, where they’d say “you’re one of us, stop mentioning that you’re not white,” then they’d racially abuse me if I mentioned that I was part-Indian. Growing up there made me feel very not English.
It’s a psychological mind fuck of people telling you what you are all the time. Often my perspective of how I see myself has been defined by white people, because they’re the ones who most frequently tell me what they think I look like.
Has the way you’ve seen yourself felt consistent over time?
When my father married my mum, he was the first in the family to [marry a white person], so we were distanced. It still feels like there’s an element of distance between me and them. My experience is feeling pushed out of being Asian.
We’d go to family dos, but we’d know that we weren’t part of their thing. They were religious, we weren’t.
What’s your mixed experience been like in Birmingham?
I feel more at home than I’ve ever felt here. I’m engaging with my culture, and my neighbours are from everyone in the Islamic world. I’m engaging with my culture, and I never want to live too far from fresh ingredients and Indian shops. I feel very comfortable living in a truly mixed place, where everyone is from somewhere else rather than you feeling like you’re the only person who feels alien.
Can you tell me about your work as an artist, and how you got involved with Mixed Rage Collective?
Generally I make work about British history, colonialism, globalism and capitalism. My work in the Unapologetically Other exhibition references pictures of post 1950s working class Britain in recovery. I’m not in any of those pictures, it’s like we’ve been erased from British history. So it’s trying to put ourselves back in history. The only images I could find were us working, dying or being brutalised. I put those together to make a grotesque version of Britain. My work is an alternative version of Britishness.
I met Sevonah Golabi at Midlands Arts Centre, where I work and teach. We got into a conversation about mixed identity and our shared Scottish roots, microaggressions and how we’d never felt safe having these conversations. Sevonah made a zine with open submissions, and it made me realise that the group was a real thing. We’ve created a safe community to have these conversations, or mixed ‘rages,’ and heal trauma. Part of the exhibition is about trying to be part of the Asian community but being distanced, but finding your own community of mixed-race people. I’ve found that in the collective.
Do you think the conversation around mixedness needs to develop in any way?
I’m not sure if there’s ever really been a conversation. The conversation is starting now. Breaking down the concept of whiteness is interesting, and embracing the fact that everyone is actually mixed. Part of the message is that we’re not actually a minority, but that’s a conversation to be had later. The conversation right now is more tangible; why are there so many mixed kids in care? Why are we overrepresented in prisons? We’re starting a conversation about our experience, but I want to get more political because I’m quite wary of how far identity politics can go.
Can you sum up your mixed experience in a word?
Adversity. It’s been difficult. Some people don’t have the words to talk about it, but I’ve got nothing but words. It can be hard to put yourself out there, but it will mean other people can do it too.
See Unapologetically Other at the Midlands Arts Centre for free now. Next week I’ll be talking to… well, I haven’t quite locked that down yet. It’ll be a surprise! Subscribe to get Mixed Messages in your inbox on Monday to find out.
Enjoy Mixed Messages? Support me on Ko-Fi! Your donations, which can start from £3, help me pay for the transcription software needed to keep this newsletter weekly, as well as special treats for subscribers.
Mixed Messages is a weekly exploration of the mixed-race experience, from me, Isabella Silvers. My mom is Punjabi (by way of East Africa) and my dad is white British, but finding my place between these two cultures hasn’t always been easy. That’s why I started Mixed Messages, where each week I’ll speak to a prominent mixed voice to delve into what it really feels like to be mixed.
Hi Niall, i resonated with feeling othered and love your poem! Best wishes, Penn
I'm really enjoying your newsletter, Isabella. I'm fascinated by the infinite permutations of identity. What better way to showcase those idiosyncrasies than having a conversation? You've got a new fan.