Paris Smith: “You have to work to engage with your culture when it’s not so permanent”
The model on her hair journey, using her platform for progress and her political existence
Hi, welcome back to Mixed Messages! This week’s guest is model and Made In Chelsea star Paris Smith, who is of mixed-South African, Zambian, Zimbabwean and English heritage. I’ve been watching Paris on Made In Chelsea since her debut on the reality series in 2020, where she’s spoken openly about identity, her natural hair journey and racism in dating. I’m really excited to bring you her story below.
How do you define your identity?
I’m English on my dad’s side and South African, Zambian and Zimbabwean on my mum’s side. I’ve always recognised myself as mixed-race, as a person of colour. In South Africa, I’d be called Coloured, whereas in the Western world we’d never use that term.
The first time someone called me half-caste was in primary school in London, but I didn't know what that meant. I thought it was another word for mixed-race, so I used it for myself once until someone asked “how can you say that about yourself?”
Has how you’ve thought about yourself changed over time?
I grew up in Zambia for two years from about five years old, then came back to London before moving to Thailand for a bit. Because I had that time in Africa, I've always felt quite strong in my roots and not felt like I had to change anything to be myself.
Being mixed-race was quite a unique thing in Zambia, there weren’t a lot of us, so I did stand out. But I didn’t feel any prejudice towards it. People almost idolised it, which is also a whole other weird scenario. In Thailand, I stood out a lot. I was called a ‘khon dam,’ which means someone who is dark because they work outside. It was a normal term for them to use. In London, I went to schools where there weren't many Black people and I definitely felt it.
What was your cultural upbringing like across all these places?
In Zambia, it was pretty easy to connect with my African culture, but then I didn't necessarily have my British cultural experience. Food was such a big part of the community in Africa, my mum still cooks for me every week. In Thailand I was just so young and excited to experience new cultures. I really enjoyed seeing how different people live, it definitely gave me a much more open mind.
Coming to England, I didn't really have any African family but I do have a lot of my UK family here, so I found myself embracing British culture while trying to stay connected to my African roots. I did that through music. My mum’s family who were in Zulu tribes in South Africa used music as storytelling and for healing ceremonies. I'm quite a spiritual person, so I feel like it's in my blood. I try to use those inspirations in things that I do creatively.
There’s work you have to put in yourself to engage with your culture when it’s not so permanent in the country you're living in, but it’s a beautiful feeling when you find those things that resonate.
You’ve been speaking about your natural hair and bringing out your beautiful curls a lot more lately – can you tell me a bit about your hair journey?
In Zambia, I remember my cousins and I braiding each other’s hair, it was part of the community. Back in London in a predominantly white school, it was partly just easier to manage when my hair was straight. My mum has different textured hair, and I think she wasn't quite sure how to deal with my unruly hair. I was quite a crybaby, I’ll be honest, so I would scream at her. That became stressful for both of us.
I also remember being in ballet class at school and being shouted at because my hair was frizzy. It was just easier to not get told off in class and keep my hair straight. I already felt, and was treated, like an outsider because of the colour of my skin, so I just wanted to fit in. I really felt that pressure from such a young age, and all the years of blow-drying and straightening damaged my hair.
Now, I feel so empowered by my curly hair. I sometimes still straighten it and feel comfortable doing both, but in general, I’ve been trying to connect to my roots where natural hair has been used as a form of protest. I started learning about whitewashing and how much that affected me more than I thought. I’m proud to have my curly hair, because it is quite an emotional journey of having to recognise where that came from. I’m having fun with it.
Was there something specific that made you want to reconnect with roots?
I went through a stage of personal growth at the beginning of last year, and I feel like God woke me up, as nuts as that sounds. I was living, but I wasn't feeling connected to myself as much as I would like to. I felt lost in my identity. I feel like God made me evaluate everything in a different way. I definitely prayed for that.
Then I started making sure to go out of my way to be in predominantly Black or mixed spaces where I could hear their experiences with hair and how they connect to their own culture to try and reach that for myself. It’s been a spiritual process.
You’re one of the first and few cast members of colour on Made In Chelsea, receiving both racism and praise from viewers. What has it been like to be on the show and speak about your experiences?
I'm really appreciative to be able to bring those conversations to a space where people are looking at London through the lens of Made In Chelsea. I'm grateful that I've had the opportunity to speak on that platform and to see people really resonate with those conversations. For the people that weren’t receptive, that’s a real shame for them. I hope that conversations like this open up doors for more progress.
When I spoke about what it was like to date outside of your race on Made In Chelsea. People messaged me saying they’d never heard about that experience and thanked me for having that conversation. It was tough to have conversations during Black Lives Matter, but nothing changes if you don't speak about it, if you don’t try. The amount of good that came out of it, in the end, is amazing to see.
Have you noticed any stereotypes around mixedness?
There are stereotypes for all races, and a lot of them can be quite harmful. But the truth is that we're all individuals with our own character, and there isn't one way to be mixed-race or a person of colour. Made In Chelsea is a platform where I can show people that. The more we speak about that, people can learn and see the impact of that.
What’s the best thing about being mixed for you?
The expression of love between different cultures that could come together and be part of that change. Being mixed-race has always been so political, especially in South African apartheid. To be here today through it all is a form of protest which I attribute to my wonderful parents.
The fact that my dad spent so much time educating himself on politics for me was really beautiful. We’re able to have those easy, open conversations where I feel comfortable, and it’s really valuable for me as a person of colour to know that my dad really cares and put himself out there to understand what it’s like to be me.
Can you sum up your mixed experience in one word?
Political.
Next week, I’ll be speaking to Cuckoo author Callie Kazumi. Subscribe to get Mixed Messages in your inbox on Monday. Shop Mixed Messages tote bags and bookmarks on Etsy now!
Enjoy Mixed Messages? Support me on Ko-Fi! Your donations, which can start from £3, help me pay for the transcription software needed to keep this newsletter weekly, as well as special treats for subscribers. I also earn a small amount of commission (at no extra cost to you) on any purchases made through my Bookshop.org and Amazon affiliate links, where you can shop books, music and more by mixed creators.
Mixed Messages is a weekly exploration of the mixed-race experience, from me, Isabella Silvers. My mom is Punjabi (by way of East Africa) and my dad is white British, but finding my place between these two cultures hasn’t always been easy. That’s why I started Mixed Messages, where each week I’ll speak to a prominent mixed voice to delve into what it really feels like to be mixed.
I have been researching the history of the term "half-caste", can you believe nobody has looked into its origins before? It's a disturbing story tied up with the forcible removal of mixed-race children from their native mothers in the late 18th and early 19th century, and it's a category that was constructed entirely by the British Empire (i.e. nothing to do with the Indian caste system). The term has been rejected by mixed-race people for 200 years yet many of us have grown up with this slur still lingering over us.