Travis Alabanza: “Spaces that talk about mixed identity are a way of archiving our experiences”
The artist on how their trans identity aligns with their mixed heritage
Hi, welcome back to Mixed Messages! This week I’m speaking to Travis Alabanza, who is of African-American, Filipino and white-European heritage. Travis is a trans artist and playwright whose gender non-conforming identity has, at times, both complicated and complemented their mixed-race heritage. It was a joy to speak to them and add nuance to the conversation on mixedness.
How do you define your racial identity?
My mum is African-American, but I’m also Filipino and white-European. People often assume that ‘mixed’ means Black and white, so it’s important for me to explain.
I used to always call myself Black, because I was raised in an all-Black household. But as I’ve grown, it’s been more important to me to say Black-mixed and show that there are other parts to me. It’s taken time to realise I can be more explorative – things don’t have to be black or white.
I also want to acknowledge the privileges that come with being lighter skinned, and not take up space that blocks the full spectrum of Black identity from being seen.
Did your parents ever speak to you about race?
Yeah! It was obvious I looked different to my family on my mum’s side, so the conversation happened really quick about why she was darker than me, especially as a single mum with the other side of my family not present. Our hair texture is also visibly different, and she had to learn to do my curls, which was often our gateway into conversations about race and family history.
You’ve spoken about the importance of Black and queer Black spaces – do you think there’s a need for mixed-race spaces?
I think the more dialogue, the better, and the more specific dialogue, the better. Spaces that talk about mixed-race identity are a way of archiving our experiences.
For me, I’ve been able to find those conversations in wider groups, so I don’t know if I personally have a need for a mixed-race group. It’s been key for me to understand nuance within the Black community, so I want to grow that understanding to include and incorporate everyone, including mixed people. But different people need different things.
How has your gender identity affected your mixed-race identity, and vice versa?
My race always reminds me that things are more complicated, which is helpful when exploring your gender in a way that people in your community won’t always approve of. Growing up on a council estate in Bristol, this had its issues. A lot of the time, you have to really remind yourself that you’re not the problem. It all goes hand-in-hand with finding yourself.
Sometimes there’s a negative stereotype of how people in the Black community think about trans people, but it’s been really powerful for me to say that I have a supportive mum who’s never had an issue with anything – except maybe my makeup technique...
Did you see any mixed-race representation growing up?
When you’re Black and gender non-conforming, you have to grab what you can see. Prince was a huge inspiration as someone who was messing with gender, and Pete Burns I saw as someone who was breaking the rules, but I didn’t see anything on the Black trans experience. That’s why campaigns like Pantene’s Your Hair Your Dream campaign is important because people think that being gender non-conforming doesn’t go hand in hand with beauty.
It’s also important for people to see me with my Black mum and our Black hair. Go off! If another kid gets to see an example of a mum supporting their trans child, maybe they’ll have more hope about their own family. I’ve also had a lot of parents reach out to me to say that the video has helped them see that they could be ok with their kids, which is amazing.
Are there any mixed-race people you look up to now?
Things have changed so much in the last ten years. I love that I can watch Pose and see all these trans and gender non-conforming people of different races, like Indya Moore. I love Kai-Isaiah Jamal too, who just walked for Louis Vuitton – crushing the game! Then I can go to the Tate and see work from game designer Danielle Brathwaite-Shirley… pick a place, we’re doing bits!
Does it ever get boring talking about your race?
Some days you’ll have moments where you don’t want to talk about it. But talking helps you understand things, and can help other people too. Sometimes I think there’s all this focus on what we can see about someone, but not what they’re actually feeling inside.
Sometimes the mixed-race conversation gets stuck on “I was made to feel one or the other”, and these things are valid. But we’re also benefiting because we are mixed-race and might have lighter skin. It’s possible to have had both benefits and troubles at the same time.
If you could sum up your experience in the Your Hair Your Dream campaign in one word, what would it be?
Powerful.
Find out more about the Pantene Your Hair Your Dream campaign here. Next week, I’ll be talking to Cbeebies presenter Ben Cajee. Subscribe to get Mixed Messages in your inbox next Monday!
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Mixed Messages is a weekly exploration of the mixed-race experience, from me, Isabella Silvers. My mom is Punjabi Indian (by way of East Africa) and my dad is White British, but finding my place between these two cultures hasn’t always been easy. That’s why I started Mixed Messages, where each week I’ll speak to a prominent mixed voice to delve into what it really feels like to be mixed.