Anjali Enjeti: "Terminology can open doors to understanding yourself"
The author on overcoming invisibility, performing culture and the layers of mixedness
Hi, welcome back to Mixed Messages! This week, I’m speaking to author, teacher and organiser Anjali Enjeti, who is of Indian, Puerto Rican and Australian heritage. I’m always keen to speak to fellow Indian-mixed people to compare and contrast our experiences, even if we grew up on different sides of the world. Here, Anjali shares some of the thoughts that form Southbound, her collection of essays on identity, inheritance and social change.
How do you define your ethnicity?
The term I use most often is mixed-race, or brown. I then specify that I’m half-Indian, a quarter Puerto Rican and a quarter Australian, because my mother is also mixed.
The terms I use today weren’t around for me when I was young. The word I heard most was multicultural, which isn’t exactly accurate.
What kind of communities did you grow up in?
I grew up primarily in whiteness so I didn’t bond with an Indian-American or South Asian-American community until later in life.
Now, I live in a heavily South Asian area and am immersed in the community. That’s mainly through political activism; I was an electoral organiser and co-founded the Georgia chapter of They See Blue, which is an organisation for South Asian Democrats. Also, many of my dear friends are South Asian writers. It’s been a joy for me to find these authentic connections to the South Asian community that didn’t come from traditional notions of culture and heritage.
Did you ever speak to your family about your mixedness?
We didn’t talk about the fact that my brother and I were mixed, but there was an assumption at the time that you could have mixed-heritage children and there would never be any identity struggles. Or maybe we didn’t have the language to have that conversation, with my parents speaking Hindi, German and Telugu.
I’m hoping that I’m having the conversations that I didn’t get to have with my family with my own children because there are so many more resources helping us know what to say now.
You mentioned language – how has that played a part in understanding your identity?
Terminology can definitely open doors for new understandings. I think it was only when I was 18 that I saw ‘multiracial’ on forms – before then, it was Black, white and Hispanic. There weren’t even categories for Asians.
When I didn’t have language and terminology to describe myself, I felt erased from any dialogue about identity. If you don’t have language, it’s often the root of an identity crisis, not knowing where you belong or how to announce yourself into the world.
I’m grateful that today we have more accurate and inventive ways to describe identity. I’ve been throwing out possible terms, trying them on like clothing, but they gravitate towards brown. It will be interesting to see what things are like for this new mixed generation who don’t have a dominant race.
How important is South Asian culture in grounding you?
I’ll start by saying we’re all enough. We don’t have to prove our heritage with any external markers; just because I don’t host Diwali celebrations at my house or have never worn a sari, doesn’t make me any less Indian.
It’s important for us mixed folks to not have a hierarchy to prove our connection to a community or culture. That’s a lose-lose situation.
Did you see any mixed representation that resonated with you when you were younger?
For the most part, no. I was in my late 20s when I saw Mira Nair’s movie Mississippi Masala, starring Sarita Choudhury. I was incredibly moved by this movie with Indian-Americans in the South, which I’d never seen before. Then I found out that she was mixed, which blew me away.
Now, there’s Kamala Harris, but that’s complicated. The South Asian community tends to erase her Blackness, and that her Indian mother raised her as a Black woman.
Can you tell me about your work as an author?
My debut novel, The Parted Earth, has a biracial Indian and white character who struggled with disconnection from her heritage. It’s challenging to hold on to all the parts of your mixed identities so they don’t become extinct. It feels like you're constantly throwing balls in the air, and there’s a chance that one of them will fall and smash a critical part of your heritage.
My second book, Southbound is a collection of essays about how identity propels activism. I speak about the fact that mixed people don’t necessarily get the chance to label themselves before society labels you. There’s a constant tension between how you see yourself and how society sees you. When it happens when you’re such a young child, it really shapes who you are, until you realise that you actually have the agency to define yourself.
As I was writing each book, I didn’t feel like I was thinking about my mixed identity, but it became a big feature of my work.
What’s the best thing about being mixed?
It’s given me an ability to connect with a wide group of people. I feel like I can move between one group and another because I don't feel so married to one culture.
Can you define your mixed identity in a word?
Layered, like an onion. You peel off the layers to get to the core.
Next week, I’ll be talking to footballer and The Turmeric Co founder Thomas Hal Robson-Kanu. Subscribe to get Mixed Messages in your inbox on Monday.
Enjoy Mixed Messages? Support me on Ko-Fi so I can continue to grow this newsletter! Your donations, which can start from £3, help me pay for the transcription software needed to keep this newsletter weekly.
Mixed Messages is a weekly exploration of the mixed-race experience, from me, Isabella Silvers. My mom is Punjabi Indian (by way of East Africa) and my dad is White British, but finding my place between these two cultures hasn’t always been easy. That’s why I started Mixed Messages, where each week I’ll speak to a prominent mixed voice to delve into what it really feels like to be mixed.